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Dream Language

frankie heart (timepunching)
Title: Dream Language
Pairing: Charles/Erik
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me.
Author's note: Thanks to [info]phineasjones for beta.

Summary: It could only be one person calling at 3:00 in the morning from somewhere in northern Canada, a person who has just woken from a dream knowing he was not alone in his mind.




Charles settles himself in his bed, stripped to a white t-shirt and boxers and the socks he always wears to increase the circulation in his legs. He closes his eyes, focuses on the soft cushion of the pillow beneath his head, the crisp sheets under him; and then he turns his thoughts to Erik.

He isn't sure he can find him without Cerebro. It's been ages since he's tried to reach out to Erik without his powers amplified by the machine. But his mind has already picked up Erik's trail. As he lets go of his doubts and finds he's moving at such a speed that he can't see what he's passing; blurs of trees and roads and clouds. Eventually, he is able to pick out a neighborhood, street numbers, an apartment building. Suddenly, he is in Erik's bedroom. Erik's arm is thrown across the pillow, his face resting in the crook of his elbow, the sheet tangled at his hip; Erik is wearing a t-shirt but is otherwise naked. Charles remembers this is Erik's preferred way to sleep. He listens to Erik breathe, aching with each moment of it, feeling it in his physical body, almost as if Erik's body is warm against his own.

And then he does what has come here to do; to step into Erik's dreams, to read his thoughts when he's most vulnerable, and most unaware.

The problem with dreams is that they are rarely straightforward. They are collections of images that would never make sense in consciousness; they draw on the dreamer's thoughts and memories and form their own narrative. For this reason, Charles cannot simply walk into Erik's mind and appear like a character in the story. Erik would wake instantly and would probably have a terrible headache from the invasion. Instead, Charles has to weave himself into the dream, tiny tendrils at a time. It is amazingly effective; through subtle suggestion and observation, there is almost no limit to what Charles could learn.

Charles had fallen into Erik's dreams before, when they slept in the same bed together. Charles would find himself in Erik's head, dreaming his dreams when they were both asleep. Erik found it fascinating, powerful evidence of their connection and of Charles' love for him; for Erik, it was a cherished moment where an otherwise restrained Charles let loose his powers. Charles finds it ironic how he is now approaching the same gesture with stealth.

At first, Charles is lost in the raw chaos of Erik's consciousness; he has to reacquaint himself with Erik's mind, his senses. Then, the dream images become clear.

Erik dreams of their apartment in Israel; it's not an exact replica, but Charles recognizes the important symbols; the iron railings of their porch, the wool blanket on the back of the couch. Erik is looking for something in the apartment. He finds John, who looks younger than he really is, waiting in the kitchen. He's flicking his lighter, over and over, but ignoring Erik. Charles understands that Erik is comforted that John is there, but hurt that he won't acknowledge him. Erik begins to close the curtains of all of the windows and John speaks finally, saying, "Leave it. I don't mind."

Erik dreams of the duplicate Cerebro at Alkali Lake; Charles can feel the heavy weight of Erik's cape, the security of the helmet around his head protecting him. Erik pauses at the doorway, and when the door opens for him, the greeting is not the real Cerebro's "Hello, Professor," but Charles' own voice, saying "Hello Erik."

Erik dreams of a body of water, not Alkali Lake, nothing Charles recognizes, nor, it seems, does Erik. He stands knee-deep in the cold water, gazing out at the horizon. He watches a loon land with a splash in the water; it settles its wings, and calls out hauntingly. The sound echoes over the lapping water.

Charles is overcome with longing, his or Erik's, he's not sure. He wants to speak but this is not the time. He's a guest here; already his strong emotions are betraying him and he suspects Erik might be able to sense him. It's confirmed when Erik speaks in the dream, "Charles?"

Charles has to master himself to keep from answering. He offers only a subtle acknowledgment, and Erik seems to understand this and moves on as though Charles were just another piece of the dream.

Except that Erik begins to swim out to the loon. His clothing snags at some current in the water, and he starts to sink. Charles struggles desperately to keep Erik from going under; Erik refuses to stop and the water rises to his chin, over his mouth, until he is completely underwater.

Charles collides harshly with his physical self, tense and rigid in his bed; he's drenched in sweat and his muscles ache. He sits up, confused and weak. The telephone rings.

It could only be one person calling at 3:00 in the morning from somewhere in northern Canada, a person who has just woken from a dream knowing he was not alone in his mind.

Charles answers with an apology. "I'm sorry, Erik."

"What ever for?" Erik's voice is deep and thick from sleep. "You could always use the telephone if you really want to reach me. I'll happily recount all I remember of my dreams."

"And you dream of the loon often?" Charles asks.

"What are birds symbols for, then?"

"The higher self, I believe."

"Interesting. This particular bird seemed to have your name."

There is silence on the line. Finally, Charles says, "There's no way I can see you, is there?"

"Can't your jet cross international borders?"

"You know what I mean."

"I do. I'm not certain it would be a good idea, old friend. Still, I would not turn you away were you to appear at my door."

"I'll remember that."

"So, goodnight, then, Charles?"

"Goodnight, Erik. Sweet dreams."

Charles hangs up the phone and considers waking Scott to ask him when the jet might be ready for a long flight, but decides he might have a clearer mind, and thus make sounder decisions, in the morning. He lies back down but finds he cannot fall asleep.

Comments

( 23 comments — Leave a comment )
[info]penknife wrote:
Nov. 14th, 2004 08:46 am (UTC)
Oh, I love this, very, very much. I love the details, like the heavy weight of Erik's cape, the security of the helmet around his head protecting him. I love Charles trying to save Erik from drowning, at the point where it's no longer clear whose dream that is.

I ... for some reason I have a serious weakness for middle-of-the-night phone conversations between these two. And Charles and his temptations and his better judgment. And ... yes. Sorry to babble. You're just reminding me why I love these two, and why they make me cry.
[info]jjtaylor wrote:
Nov. 15th, 2004 07:14 am (UTC)
Thanks! I too have a weakness for late-night conversations, where all the rules are momentarily suspended in the dark and it seems possible for them to just talk. Even if Charles' 'better judgment' kicks in the next morning.
[info]marginalia wrote:
Nov. 14th, 2004 11:36 am (UTC)
oh, this is amazing! i continue to resist this fandom - it's quite an investment - but these two lure me.
[info]jjtaylor wrote:
Nov. 15th, 2004 07:15 am (UTC)
Thanks so much! And I'm flattered that you liked this even as you're resisting the fandom. These two are truly a fandom in themselves, so if you ever want to join in......
[info]marginalia wrote:
Nov. 15th, 2004 10:10 pm (UTC)
so evil. :D
[info]penknife wrote:
Nov. 15th, 2004 01:12 pm (UTC)
Think about it this way; it's not nearly as much of an investment as X-Men comicsverse, which requires digesting decades of canon involving giant robots and time-traveling clones. X-Men movieverse just has two movies' worth of canon to deal with. And it's hard to beat Xavier/Magneto for a pairing with history.
[info]marginalia wrote:
Nov. 15th, 2004 10:14 pm (UTC)
this is true. though the mere existence of the comicsverse scares the hell out of me ;)
[info]astraynotion wrote:
Nov. 14th, 2004 04:39 pm (UTC)
Ahh... fantastic stuff. The psychological aspects are just seductive...
[info]jjtaylor wrote:
Nov. 15th, 2004 07:15 am (UTC)
Thanks so much!
[info]artaxastra wrote:
Nov. 15th, 2004 07:32 am (UTC)
This is beautiful. I like the image of the loon, and the question of what it means. Also with the punning: loon-loony-lune. Interesting choice, rather than a duck!

And of course Erik can call Charles whenever he wants. But not hte other way around.
[info]jjtaylor wrote:
Nov. 15th, 2004 08:02 am (UTC)
Thanks so much!

And of course Erik can call Charles whenever he wants.

It's completely true - I've always considered it one of those unspoken rules between them. But Charles calling Erik - well, that's another thing entirely. He'd have to have a reason.
[info]tartanshell wrote:
Nov. 15th, 2004 10:47 pm (UTC)
Oh, gorgeous fic! I, too, have a thing for late-night phone calls between these two, and this one was just perfect. *sniff*
[info]jjtaylor wrote:
Nov. 16th, 2004 05:51 am (UTC)
Thanks so much! I figure these two have a serious history of calling each other in the middle of the night as though it were the most normal thing in the world.
[info]jcalanthe wrote:
Nov. 16th, 2004 01:25 am (UTC)
Oh that was marvelous. Thanks to [info]penknife for the rec!
[info]jjtaylor wrote:
Nov. 16th, 2004 05:52 am (UTC)
Thanks so much for reading!
[info]viciouswishes wrote:
Nov. 16th, 2004 02:23 am (UTC)
Wonderful look into the hidden dynamic and connections of Erik/Charles. How Charles is always trying to save Erik from himself, but at the same time Charles believes himself rather foolish for trying.
[info]jjtaylor wrote:
Nov. 16th, 2004 05:56 am (UTC)
How Charles is always trying to save Erik from himself, but at the same time Charles believes himself rather foolish for trying.

Oh, it's so true. Charles thinks he's doing the right thing always - and I like to imagine that Erik finds it just a little amusing after all this time.

Thanks for reading!
[info]mylexie wrote:
Nov. 16th, 2004 05:35 am (UTC)
oh, this is so beautiful. Sad in a not-so-sad way, which is an accomplishment when you write X/M. They love each other. They truly do love each other.
[info]jjtaylor wrote:
Nov. 16th, 2004 05:57 am (UTC)
Thanks so much. They really do love each other - that's what hurts so much.
[info]mylexie wrote:
Nov. 17th, 2004 12:30 am (UTC)
I know. *hurts*
[info]flyingtapes wrote:
Nov. 16th, 2004 07:44 am (UTC)
This is absolutely lovely. Very much how I picture my Charles and Erik.
[info]jjtaylor wrote:
Nov. 16th, 2004 09:03 am (UTC)
Thanks so much!
[info]kassrachel wrote:
Nov. 23rd, 2004 06:08 pm (UTC)
Oh, this is totally wonderful.

I actually just posted a Charles/Erik lucid dreaming story. There must be something in the air... :-)
( 23 comments — Leave a comment )

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